Finding Temporary Sanctuary… Intermittent Peace
Years that last forever, shapes unchanged, Rock of Ages, Beauty,
Endless, endless the nights without driven dreams, Awakens,
Exposing the stars, delivered by bright thoughts, Strength,
Forgive me for not knowing what I had come across,
Integral parts of the model locked in my mind,
Conversation like wet newspapers,
Crumbling as memory recedes,
Open to suggestions,
I have really been busy. I am working hard to make progress to find a job that I have the training for, and in the meantime, while that’s not happening too quick: to make a job transition into something that actually suits me. I had an interview with a previous employer today. I would like the job, but I think we both have mixed feelings. I hope to find employment that I can not only make money at, but also pursue my goals in education, psychology and mental health. This would be opposed to finding the same types of work in construction that I have often hated over the last 10+ years. Big problem with such a transition is: construction (as an electrician), tends to pay pretty well, whereas work in mental health and of course being a student does not pay well. I have a family.
My views about compassion, honesty and psychology tend to be shut down at every corner – especially in construction. How is it that helping people cope and find wellness will put me deeper in debt? Why are these jobs – that often are very involved and in extremely high demand today – so poorly paying??
ANYWAYS, I saw a really cool poem the other day on this blog site regarding ‘sanctum sanctorum’, which I had just been reading about. For that matter, I brought the idea of ‘sanctuary’ up in a class that day. The question in our discussion was ‘What is something that everyone really wants (i.e. to help with mental wellness)?’ I say: ‘sanctuary’.
The poem below is from a collection that I have sent out. The line: ‘Don’t tell me about your desires’ is not directed towards the audience. Rather it is similar to what the job system and the looming part of society (that might not always be so compassionate) might say to me. I’m not complaining about all the individuals that make up society. I am referring to the system that we are often a part of. Some of us can rise above, or at least make a niche. Sometimes we are forced to work on the front lines. I’m not intentionally comparing myself to a soldier here (That is a position that I have the utmost respect). The front-line also discusses some blue collar work – and for that matter: any difficult work. I would offer my views to anyone that it could help.
People are busting themselves up to make ends meet (All inclusive). I do put my body on the line. Whine for the day: we have to deal with: Asbestos, dangerous voltages, fiberglass, toxic dust, working at heights, sharp, dirty and toxic materials often everywhere. Boohoo for me. Some have it a lot worse. What I am trying to get at is ways to reduce stress. If we cannot reduce stress, because we are being hounded and forced to get work done without consideration for mental health, without necessary relax-time and appropriate social treatment – then there is something wrong with the system. I do have some ideas of how to fair well in this system, but they may not always work. Mindfulness and developing realistic confidence can help. Meditation is a way to escape for a while.
This is what I think a lot of us desire: some form of escape and…. sanctuary. Sometimes I think that our answers to this quest are unhealthy, partly because of the confines of “the system.” Often drugs or alcohol are seen as the only escape. I work and sometimes succeed in finding sanctuary in some places and some states of mind. Not to say that I don’t have drinks, but I always remember ‘moderation’ and set guidelines like: just a couple, no earlier than afternoon and not every day. I would like to think I take a healthy approach. If I can help others do the same and promote mental stability and wellness – this should also be a rewarding job. Is this idealistic and ego-centric? I don’t think so….
This poem does NOT really fit in to describe strategies in mental health, but it does describe how some of us may feel (in our need for sanctuary) and in some relationships. It might just be way out there, in my personal collection. I would not include this poem as a therapeutic tool. Rather it is more for discussion that some of you may appreciate. I would think that the poem is just a few crazy thoughts that some people can relate to.
Every day I have rays of sunshine,
I want now
To take it all in
Deception and correction
What it used to be
Changed when I asked
For the truth
Take it all in
The meaning and underlying truth
But what it seems to be
Might not be real
I need proof
I want proof
By psychedelic spires
Don’t tell me about
Everybody wants their
I am not sure just how aptly titled the poem is, but the closing line “Everybody wants their own perception” describes to me, the fact that many of us do really want that sacred personal space, where what we think and perceive is our own, or at least willingly, freely shared.