Monthly Archives: July 2013

Ritualization (Soul Occupation)

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Can’t see, can’t hear, can’t even think,
There is a form to the madness,
A path from the chaos,
Can’t talk, can’t walk, can’t hold a drink,
There is a flow of the progress,
A jump from the pathos
***
Framed passage to the next level,
Still holding on, Building and grasping,
Chosen item for the next ritual,
Rhythm for life is taking control
***
There is a new birth to the desire,
Want something to move you higher,
Actually finding more and more,
Soul occupation
***
Might try, might push, might even fall,
There is a growth of the presence,
A path and a method,
Might drink, might smoke, might even call,
There is a room for the distance,
A jump to go get it
***
Graded passage to the next level,
Still holding on, Building and grasping,
There’s a catalyst for the next ritual,
Rhythm of life, Take control
***
There is a new stage of the desire,
Want something just to inspire,
Actually finding more and more,
Soul occupation
***
Just learn, just yearn, yah try to take,
There is a class for the madness,
But not for the chaos,
Just work, just stretch, but just don’t break,
There’s payment for the time spent,
But not for the anxious
***
Hard labour for the next promotion,
Still holding on, building and gasping,
You’re the subject of the next ritual,
Rhythm of life, Takes control
***
There is satisfaction of the desire,
Everyday something to inspire,
Forever more,
Soul occupation

Putting Experience into Words

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I am approaching some of the hurdles in my goal to change careers.   I want to find a career in psychology, which also means I need to get more education, somewhere along the way.  Communications is another big hurdle.  I have been working hard at it, and as usual: saying a lot.  I will have to reach out to a lot of people, with a lot of info to have a chance.   I need to find mentors in academics.   I feel that I have made progress.   I have found my way to opportunities, and I am starting to realize how to make communications work better… over a long period of time.  I should of course mention that this blog is creative writing and part of my efforts, but that some of the more important writing in my goal-pursuit, is more research-based and not on this blog.

This blog may be one example of reaching out.  I do feel that writing out insights and planning out loud can propel a goal.  Social networking can build contacts with confidence that can encourage success.  The only way I am going to get ahead is by taking at least a few necessary (and only mild to moderate) risks.  So for example, I will send out notes in a wide range of media that may appeal to some, but not to others.  I need to appeal to the widest amount, while still being dedicated to my specific interests.  I seek to gain many more contacts, but I risk losing some other contacts. I have been writing more than a few blogs now and there has been some increases in readership.   I hope my candour is helping my cause.  I hope that some of my comments are taken with a grain of salt, and that my view will be appreciated enough to help me win people’s confidence.

Writing that dates back to twenty-five years ago could potentially have a different sort of impact.  I am a bit concerned that some of these views may be mistaken for my current view.

It is poetry? Sometimes words are flowing and powerful.  Other times words are just pushed together in an effort to relay a simple message. Does it work?  Complex messages bring a greater challenge.   I think this poem falls somewhere in between.  All these complex topics are challenging, and also I put a time limit on it.  It is after all a hobby – poetry.  Time constraints are a big concern for anyone, but especially when stress and the ‘to-do’ lists are starting to pile up.  It takes time to do anything – read a poem, write a poem, or explain your work to others.

Often social issues can rise from the content and tempo of a conversation – or for that matter: in creative writing.  Some people while reading can also tend to speed up, and in doing so lose the message.  In presenting essays or poems – time clearly plays a factor.  I hope you will keep in mind that these blogs are written according to time constraints. These are the words that I worked with today:

Talk Therapy

Through the lens of history I see today:
A world inviting new definition,
I throw out bold, brash comments left and right,
No fear for casualty in attrition,

From this stark rage I am running into,
Studies in the particular topics,
I see so clearly the pointed brilliance,
Of science tremendous yet microscopic,

Focussed, I still appreciate the morning,
As the sun burns through the tired clouds,
There’s no ideal perception I’m scorning,
Our thoughts can come together to be quite proud,

Whatever differences we have conceived,
These ideas often ripe for the picking,
This basket is filled for the family,
These cases are common and count still clicking,

Not one mistaken morsel is piling,
As the day’s selection is painstaking,
Slight variance celebrated, we’re smiling,
Certainly strict measures: so ground-breaking,

It is too early to see if it will,
Come into focus for the consumer,
The creator, keeper and provider,
Now challenged to use care with rumour,

The product is not yet marketable,
Is it in the recommended diet?
Traces of a mild toxin have been found,
It’s been handled, but can you deny it?

Was it from the cooking-preparation?
Antique methods, with utensils tainted,
Or inherited from generations,
Socially defined – a true form painted,

Hard core, but a soft heart, thick-skin cladded,
Theory in numbers – would you be surprised?
Pesticides, or something that may have been added?
It is what this earth yields that still defies,

Can it be used  – an exquisite new dish?
Perhaps a seasoning that we forgot,
Or a brand new perspective that we missed,
The right dose compliments what I last bought,

The words blend smooth like an old recipe,
The thoughts won’t fade, and help me manage well,
Helping others works so effectively,
Main course waits, appetizing vantage tells.

Like I say words pushed together.

 

A blog is usually pretty casual -even personal. A person applying for an interview is typically formal. I think I have been compromising the formal -especially when I publish this. Can we say that this is a sign of modern media and “the blog”? I would hope that these ideas could reflect on useful ways to interact in such a scenario. I don’t talk like this in everyday life. I don’t have that much freedom. I expect that some of you may question my methods while others will share an interest – even inspiration (Please comment). Best to all.

Words to Say

I just wanted to say a few words tonight.  I am back at regular work today – really full on into hard work, but it went well.  I had a meeting also … seemed a bit apprehensive, but it also went well.

I have talked a lot about perspective and a holistic viewpoint.  Really???  That’s pretty difficult to pin down.  Say that I call the view of a macrocosm as holistic.  That’s fine, but it has been brought to my attention that a truly holistic view might be very hard to achieve.  My friend asked, “How could one person be able to see that much – the views of others…  six billion others plus… ?”  Well, I think for our purposes – that is stretching it a bit.

Anyways that’s just something that has been pointed out to me.  Of course, for a single practice: A whole would not encompass as much of a universal view;  Rather at one time – one would strive to address all of the aspects that affect one life… one person’s macrocosm?

I try to be approachable, yet with a lot of this talk… it’s just me.  I know that I address the ironies a lot, synchronicity even.  Really I am stable and steady!  These connections are treated as anomalies. My perception and focus seem to be drawn a certain way sometimes, but I am quickly able to regain focus in any practical situation. Really these are totally objective views. The meaning in synchronicity is often subjective only in the connection (that others cannot see). If these experiences were falsifiable, they would be totally objective examples of the phenomenon – beyond common science. Hopefully I will have the opportunity in academics that my hard work and achieving productivity will happen enough to get me past that old stigmatizing focus.   Do you know that if you send a reply – it goes through my email first?  Feel free to drop me a line.

The following poem was written in a hurry, but I held on to it.  I picture it to a reggae beat.  It is supposed to be happy.  🙂

Say . . .

What you mean is words to say,

We’re going to say it our own way,

What you mean is words to find,

We’re going to find it in our own mind,

What you need is things to see,

We’re going to find what we believe,

What you need is things to know,

We’re going to find it high and low,

Nothing can be taken for granted,

Even the truth slightly slanted,

Or the rhyme and the rhythm falsely taken,

What you want is peace of mind,

We’re going to stay happy for all time,

What you want is peace forever,

We might not be that clever,

What we want is things to remain,

We’re going to find it change again,

What we want is a few more friends,

That will stay until the end

Sounds a bit sour perhaps.  The bridge: “The rhyme and the rhythm falsely taken”- It is all about interpretation.  Hard to judge sometimes, especially without a tone of voice or other indication… Perceptions can change too.  Add music – it could be totally different.  Really the conclusion is up:  Make more friends… Isn’t that positive?  Maybe it’s ambiguous.  I hope you appreciate it.  That is my intention.

Anyways, I hope you are well, and this sideways poetry hasn’t put you off…  Best wishes, whatever time of day – where and when you are reading this.

Vision

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My craft in recovery.

Whoa…..  I drew this in the nineties, fully aware that our world in this life is only the beginning to our consciousness. I still have many viewpoints similar to back then, but I am able to make decisions that are less troublesome today, having digested my years of waking dreams. I know now to pay more attention to the concrete demands of daily life and have more patience for decision-making in emotional & dream-like situations.

The poem below was written as I went to university.  In fact, I put it as the title page for an essay on Shamanism (as an alternate healing treatment).  I got an A- and was a bit disappointed in that, but looking back, some of my work was too heavily influenced by my moods and any A was acceptable!  The poem again looks at perspectives and awareness.  It is the mood that can be like a dream state that when grounded in practical applications can help us shape our consciousness for the better of our world.

Vision

Stranger places, I have never been,

Things like this, I have never seen,

Living in a world that lives with me,

My body confined, but my mind is free,

The illusion of daylight buries the gem,

Obscuring the truths to be found in them,

The mystic sees through the physical light,

Past the material to eternal night,

Ancient lands where I have never been,

Strangers faces that I have never seen,

Exploring places in another time,

Discovering treasures locked in my mind,

As I awake, the gem still glitters in my mind,

Then I open my eyes and leave it behind,

Surely the day could join in such travels,

The gift that the night always unravels,

Once forgotten, now the apple is rotten,

Without ever eating the last bite,

Falling down with a triumphant sound,

The dying dream leaves seeds for the light.

 

Do we make it? (Daily Quest)

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Do we make it?

Let’s face it,

Life changes all the time,

Chasing the dream, growing the treasure,

Are they going to take away all of our pleasure?

 

Just for a day, follow the concrete,

Surely going to claw back until we are complete,

The sidewalk, the curb,

The road with no freedom,

All it is there for, is to channel our need of:

 

Forward progression,

Look ahead:

I’ve got a compass that is chipped in one place,

It keeps on spinning, and I can still read the face,

Something magnetic about the dreams that we chase,

First we find the map, now we run the maze,

 

Finding out life is easy,

Remember what you need,

Now, it doesn’t seem so easy,

Unravel time’s travel as you gradually succeed,

 

Do you hate me?

Push through it – I have loved you all the time,

Finding the moment, fix the reception,

So it can be seen in its true complexion,

 

Just to be alright now, create a new pathway,

Then come back later, much before the last day,

Of the week, the month,

The year with no ending,

Can the vision be realized without comprehending?

 

Forward progression,

I’ve got a thought about changing this place,

But, it’s not going to matter, if I can’t make a case,

Abstract solution, to help win this race,

Putting words into action, in an empty space,

(in a peaceful place, in our mind)

 

Finding out life is easy,

Predict just what you’ll need,

Now, it doesn’t seem so easy,

Envision time’s precision as you gradually succeed

 

The Mind’s Back Door (Nihilistic Bliss)

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You won’t know what you’ve got until you get inside

No, you won’t know a thing past the day and night

Wake up into our eternal home

We’re on our own, but not alone

You won’t know what you’ve got until you get inside

No, you won’t know a thing until you’ve been and tried

Wake up into the great unknown

Thoughts are the wealth, found all alone

Eyes looking at me like they know something

Looking at me with some kind of offering

Wise and kind guide may take your hand

Present a solution, save all of this land

Conceive it, if you can

Believe in, a master plan

Conceive it, it has all been planned

Understand

Look to the skies above, the clouds are boiling

If God’s looking down, why are we still toiling?

Wake up into our eternal home

Into this place we all are thrown

The fair earth is below and the weather’s rising

We need rest, it is so compromising

Walking through thoughts made of stone

The energy within us, seldom shown

You’re looking at me as if I’m insane

You can’t be right, and I can’t explain

Try hard, real hard, to figure things out

Feelings bottle up, think away doubt

(with spirit)

What are you looking for?

Find it right outside your mind’s back door

What are you looking for?

Find it right outside my mind’s back door

The fair earth is below, media hypnotizing

We crave the sun, it’s not surprising

Walking through thought, we must atone

The energy within us waits to be shown . . .

Follow inside into insight

Intermittent Intimate

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Some might say, ‘opposites attract’.  In today’s world social situations can be very diverse and people can be brought together for a vast number of reasons.  People meet through random encounters, through work, school, on-line or many other types of association.

The following poem seems to be fairly self-explanatory to me.  I think it may reflect a very common relationship in modern society.  I would strive for more consistency, and it may be difficult to exist like this, but I think it is pretty normal.  I think that if love is found, perseverance is favourable.  It is also important to have awareness of when a relationship becomes too hard to handle, and if it is having a negative impact on you.  If you are living with negativity, this may arise from a lack of understanding, a backlash of your own behaviour, or also from the significant other’s behaviour. It is important to stand up for your health. If your health is being threatened – it may be necessary to challenge the status quo; Recognize the needs of others, but also assert your own needs.

Relationships can be very complex.  It would seem that love needs to be fiercely nurtured to promote health in a long-term relationship.  Open channels of communication, awareness of each other’s needs and willingness to compromise can be a good set of tools to work with.  When making decisions, I try to do this in a calm mood and always use reason – even when emotion also plays a role (or especially when emotion plays a role).   If we try to see the net outcome of continuing a relationship, and see more benefits than costs, both emotionally and in terms of the health of all individuals affected by the relationship:  Perseverance is the best thing.  Sometimes we do have to look out for number one, but I also try to take all others into account when making decisions – within reason.

The Pace (Intermittent Intimate)

 

It’s raining today, but it’s kind of intermittent,

While yesterday’s massive storm left me drenched,

Even the calm does not refresh,

After the moments of stress,

You were twisting your words like a wrench,

 

Sticking in my head, where you have thrown them,

Where they have gone and still wait,

In my heart, you could total,

Where they have gone and soon fade

A ballot cast by the voter,

Rumbling low like a motor,

 

There’s a pain in my head, but it’s kind of intermittent,

While yesterday’s massive thirst has been quenched,

Now the peace is not quiet,

But like an internal riot,

I am twisting around in this trench,

 

You do not know, that you have carved it,

Where I’ve gone and still twist,

And I am still starving,

But the inner strengths never missed,

Just sometimes a target,

(really, just hardly?)

 

Roll with it,

Intimate,

Roll with it,

Always keep up with the pace,

 

It’s just another night, and the calm is intermittent,

Once in a while there is a good time to play,

It seems the calm can be refreshed,

And we can leave the daily mess,

A new mood comes around like sun rays,

 

Falling on our skin,

Where it is felt the most,

Where they are warm, but may burn,

In the world that we chose,

Where they are warm and we learn,

And we are getting so close –  love gently flows,

 

Roll with it, intimate,

Intermittent Intimate,

Intimate, stick with it… Intermittent Intimate

Premonition Now

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Painting: Lee Matuga

 

This is a poem about optimism.  I believe that optimism can contribute to success.  In psychology we learned about a ‘self-fulfilling prophecy’.  Doesn’t it seem like a good idea to be optimistic when these occur?

I have found that certain things can encourage optimism, such as: sunshine, looking up to the stars on a clear night and/or sitting by the waterside, like a river, lake or ocean. A connection with nature often helps calm the nerves and even promotes optimism.  If that time is endangered: this can be fuel to challenge troubles.

Some people are hardwired to have the desire to persevere and maintain or regain optimism. Even a walk in the park, a glimpse of the mountains, or gazing at the sky can help one gain strength by proving that nature will persevere…  Well then: So can I.

I think anytime is a good time to be optimistic. I am not saying that I always have unquestionable optimism, but I always strive for it.

…..

Premonition Now – Positively Change

…

When the season guides all life’s dealing,

There will never be uncertain feelings,

But the recent changes in the weather,

Finds it lighter at the time of day and…

 

Another passage, you are thinking of it,

There is not a second you can ever doubt it,

You have changed – they are changing too, so,

Just about the time you make your move, no:

 

Disconcerting feelings,

Pondering unreal things,

Wishing it would finally happen:

Know that it is always

Sparkling in the water,

 

Jumping in, diving in,

Knowing only the stream as we are flowing,

Cold and moving, strong and proving,

There is always change,

 

When the timing’s pushing on your healing,

It might tend to send you through the ceiling,

And the recent changes from the mood swing,

Makes it harder, as if we can’t be choosing,

 

Every moment you are thinking of it,

There is not a minute you can ever doubt it,

They must change while you are changing too, so,

Just about the time you break on through, know:

 

A little ray of sunshine makes you happier than

The cloudy crowd that’s all around,

and dull and dim and on the ground,

Days fallen over your shoulder made you feel so sky-high,

Chance you couldn’t get hold of, made you feel like nighttime.

 

When the climate’s right upon your feeling,

It would even seem like you are stealing,

But the truth is: you are now the real thing,

Just like when you accidentally motioned:

 

Provision for good feelings,

Envisioning new real things,

Wishing success is happening:

Know that it is always

Sparkling in the water,

 

Jumping in, diving in,

Knowing only the stream as we are flowing,

Cold and moving, a song that’s soothing,

There is positively change,

 

A little ray of starlight makes you happier than

The darkened space that’s all around,

and full and real and the only sound,

One fallen over your shoulder made you feel so sky high,

One that you got a hold of, makes now the right time,

 

Jumping in, strive to win, following the river that is flowing,

Cold and moving, strong and proving,

There is positively change

 

Looking Past the Screen

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The constant stream of catchy news stories and exciting headlines can sometimes blur more important morals and the better qualities of human nature that – in my opinion: we should be striving for.  It may be a dog-eat-dog world, but with a bunch of effort I think that we can preserve our good intent.  This poem is kind of meant to question how aware we are of the humanity that is buried under the flashy movies, television and constant barrage of media that we perceive.  Even in viewing a still photograph – we may judge the book by its cover, and not look for deeper meaning.  Maybe…. Sometimes we are too lazy to look for the core truth of a perception – the knowledge of human consciousness and how we can help others as well as better ourselves by digging a bit more for a collectively beneficial way of perceiving and then strategizing for better morality.  A deeper and more productive level of co-operation may be lost by going with the easy answers – the first look decision, or the popular way of judging or even stereotyping.  Not to say that the first impression is always incorrect.  It may in fact be highly accurate, but other perspectives can contribute to a greater understanding.  Falling into the trap of stereotyping can be detrimental for all involved, when just a bit more time can create a more useful level of awareness.

 

Isn’t it Odd?

Isn’t it odd how all the screens glisten,

I wonder if there is a show that I’ve been missing,

I cannot fathom how to escape their glare,

I will show my strength and avoid the stare,

Isn’t it strange how nobody listens?

I wonder if they just made that decision,

Or if they are being consumed,

And are not the consumer

Wait for the words to make sense,

But it is impossible to get through when you won’t pretend – to understand.

Not only must the disbelief be suspended,

Beyond that: the lines must be connected,

Even if they go through the unknown and the highly improbable,

All is protected, by the individual,

Collectively.

Isn’t it odd how all the photos glisten,

I wonder if there is an opportunity I’ve been missing,

The unusual part is that what you see speaks,

The quiet part is sometimes the reality.

Isn’t it strange that no one searches?

I wonder if they just made that decision,

Or if they are being controlled,

And are not the controller

I’m sure the words must make sense,

But it is impossible to get through when you won’t extend

– and understand

**

Yes, it is a hard world. Sometimes it is difficult to know what media or who to trust.  I continue to be optimistic (hopefully not too much) that extra effort towards collective goals can provide the individual with success as well.  Sometimes you just have to fight to make it through, but it can also be beneficial to take time to consider the net outcome – and even draw strength from more considerate plans and strategies.  Perhaps these are idealistic goals, but we could still work with the subject matter.